Gifting with Intent: A Love Language Gift Guide

 

Written by: Alycia Oliver BA, MCP, RCC

Let’s face it, there are several times of the year where our partner may or may not expect a gift. When you roll around to Christmas, an anniversary, Valentines day, or a birthday are you ever at a loss for what to get?

If the answer is yes then I will help you understand how to gift your partner in a way that makes them feel the most loved… all you need to do is give me 5 minutes of your attention. So let’s get to it!

Expressing our love for one another can feel daunting for some, and exciting for others. We care deeply and we want to express it in a way that THEY feel loved.

Interestingly, how we give to others is often rooted in the way we would want others to give to us. In other words, we give people gifts we would want to receive.

Humans are ultimately self-protecting and self-thinking beings…. and it makes sense! In the past we had to be for survival but now in the modern world, where some could argue there are less threats, we have not moved away from the self-serving mindset.

Our mind and bodies are quick to jump into this state of thinking as it used to be connected to life or death.

Now you might be thinking… how does this connect to giving a gift to my partner? And this is where I tell you- if you step out of the self-thinking mindset and ask yourself “when does my partner feels the most loved?” that is where you will find the gold mine gift.

So I will ask you the hard question- are you prepared to give your partner a gift you would never imagine receiving if it meant that they were happy? And what if the gift isn’t something tangible- would you be content with that?

Here is the gift giving rule of thumb- use your partner's love language (how they like to receive love) as a navigation tool.

Gift Ideas for Words of Affirmation:

If your partner values your kind words, you should incorporate them into your gift idea to make your special someone feel the most loved.

Review these ideas and see which one feels right for you:

  • Write a meaningful card, or make your own if you’re feeling crafty!

  • Create a book on 50 reasons why you love or appreciate them ( Here is a good amazon purchase)

  • Get loved ones to send in videos clips and compile to create a meaningful video for them.

Gift Ideas for Quality Time:

The gift of presence and time can be all someone wants. Carving out this time for you and your loved one may be the most precious gift you could give. Remember this quality time should be focused on how your partner likes to spend time together, rather than an experience you value. This extra piece of consideration will go a long way.

Let’s walk through what this could look like:

  • Book an experience that they love

  • Plan a surprise date with everything taken care of

  • Day trip or weekend getaway

  • Block off a distraction free day together- phones away!

Gift Ideas for Physical Touch:

People who value physical touch often feel soothed and cared for by human contact. Skin to skin contact does wonders for the nervous system.

Here are a few ideas for you to consider:

  • coupon redeemable for a massage

  • Have a staycation with all the sensory elements (cuddling, a bath, sex)

  • Cozy blanket for you to share

  • customized hug pillow

  • couples yoga or tantra class

Gift Ideas for Acts of Service:

In a life where we can never get to the end of our to do lists, many feel loved when their partner goes out of their way to make their day a little easier.

Try out a few options that offer a romantic spin:

  • DIY Coupon book (covering varying responsibilities in their lives/ things you love to do together)

  • Breakfast in bed

  • Romantic dinner at home

  • meal subscription service

  • Pay for the house to get professionally cleaned

  • Spa gift card

Gift Ideas (as a love language):

For some a gift can show love in many ways. It may not simply be about the monetary value, rather more so about the “i’m thinking about you gesture”. If you’re partner like receiving gifts you may also feel some added pressure over the holiday season to get it just right.

Here are some ideas to make gift giving more intentional and thoughtful:

  • Frame a good memory you have experienced

  • Buy something that reflects a significant moment in your relationship

  • Engrave a piece of jewellery

  • A Photo book highlighting your relationship

  • Book a photographer to capture your love

If you’re unsure what your partner’s love language is, head over to our previous blog post “Love Languages: Here's How to Identify Yours”.

Happy Gifting!

 
RelationshipsAlycia Oliver